What's Next?

Am I too old to rebel?

And rebel against what exactly?

The world is treating you better than ever but...

There is something very wrong? A disconnect. A reality that somehow isn't.

At a time when we're expected to have our priorities in order, it somehow feels appropriate to leave it all behind.

Is this denial?

Denial that you're this superficial after all?

That all you really wanted was fame and money. And nothing more!

What's next?

A Welcome Return

Just trying to ease myself back into blogging shape. Wanted to share with you guys a trailer which caught my eye recently.

 
Snow White and the Huntsman is another retelling of the tale made famous by Disney. However judging from whats on the trailer this looks to be much darker and edgier than what has come before, so lets keep our fingers crossed. Lots of interesting imagery in this first trailer. The biggest issue I have here is, the film is asking us to believe that Kristen Stewart is hotter than Charlize Theron....Honestly??

GI Joe : The Rise of Another Lame Franchise

In our younger days often we hear our parents telling us to be ambitious, shoot for the sky they said, even if you missed you still land on the clouds was the reasoning. Alas though like reality when you try to fly, and if you fail, you’ll end up hurtling to earth in a burning ball of wreckage which ends up leaving an unsightly stain behind. That though is often omitted for the benefits of our delicate young minds I guess. What does that have to do with this blog I hear you ask, well the answer is in two words, Stephen Sommers. A director so apparent in his need for recreating his childish fantasies that if given any form of encouragement will definitely try to do it all in one film. Ambition in Hollywood is often a surefire way to derision and failure as demonstrated to stunning consequences like this years’ Transformers and Terminator sequels.

GI JOE is an elite multi national anti-crime/terrorist organization headed by the stout General Hawk. They are called into battle when the latest in cutting edge warfare, the nano-tech based missiles, is attacked en-route to its first delivery by forces that seem to have even more advanced weaponry. Two of the accompanying guards, Duke and Ripcord, manages to fend off the attackers and Duke also recognizes one of the attackers to be his ex fiancé now going under the guise of The Baroness. Because of their outstanding performance the 2 men are recruited into the outfit where they will serve with the existing members Scarlett, Heavy Duty and Snake Eyes. It soon becomes clear that the weapons manufacturer, James McCullen is behind an attempt to steal the missiles to both create an international crisis as well as settle a century long family blood feud.

When I first heard they were doing a GI Joe movie I snickered but held out hope they could make it relevant and when I heard they had gotten Sommers involved, expectations immediately nose dived. This was after all the man who gave us Van Helsing, a film which could have been so cool but ended up being so utterly bad that I though there would be no return for him. Sommers biggest crime is always his inherent need to cram as much elements into a film as humanly possible and his total lack of follow through on any of them as can be seen if you compared the first Mummy and its sequel. Without a strong and frugal producer’s hand behind him his films tend to be just a skipping through of one idea after another. Also reality and often even gravity is not adhered to when he writes his scripts with his protagonists often escaping peril through impossible maneuvers.

In his latest he is again guilty of the all of the above but he has managed to craft a stupid but fun, with the former edging out the later slightly, action film that while not memorable is still entertaining enough to edge out some of this summer’s more anticipated action fare. Its fun but in a very retarded sort of manner and its most enjoyable when no one’s talking or whenever Siena Miller’s breast makes an appearance, I kid you not when it say they truly steal every scene in the movie and they look much better when compared to Megan Fox’s slow motion running in Transformers 2. It was also good to see Joseph Gordon Levitt making the best out of a crap role by truly hamming it up. The action sequences are well staged with the Paris chase a highlight and also the Storm Shadow/Snake Eyes duel was handled well even through it was derivate of The Phantom Menace’s ending with a reversed role for Ray Parks.

Now for the Bad and where else to begin but from the acting department, so step right up 90% of the actors involved. Watching Channing Tatum brings to mind the other great thespian, CasperVan Diem, an actor who could convey all his emotions through a simple furrow of his brow, which is fortunate considering that’s the only action he knows how to do properly. I understand that this is an ensemble cast but couldn’t they have found a more engaging lead actor because there isn’t an aorta of charm and charisma in him which could have make such a huge difference to the film. A brief cameo by Brendan Fraser was much better the his performance for the rest of the film which boggles the mind as to why Brendan wasn’t offered the role in the first place. Dennis Quaid phoned this one in and cashed another pay check, the always mute Ray Parks is adequate as the mute Snake Eyes, Rachel Nichols brings some charm to the good girls but not much, Marlan Wayans is his usual unbearable self and Jonathan Pryce is criminally underused. The script is just full of lazy plot holes and convenient resolutions, oh! Deadly nano tech missiles are headed for Washington you say, no worries there just so happen to be a super sonic jet fighter parked nearby with no form of security around.

My advice to you, watch the movie if you have 2 hours to spare or if you have an great love for original cartoons but bear in mind that like all our childhood favorites its never as good as we remembered them to be. Watch it to see the stunning Siena Miller in what should be her breakthrough Hollywood role and for the crazy action sequences and you will have a guaranteed good time. As of the time I’m writing this the movie has already opened to great commercial success so brace yourself for the bigger, better, dumber and all around more ‘ambitious’ sequels coming your way soon.